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I Probably Screwed You Too: The Mostly True Stories of Kenny "Starmaker" Bolin, by Kenny Bolin
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There's a reason they call Kenny Bolin the Starmaker. For nearly a decade, Kenny Bolin sent more men from Louisville's Ohio Valley Wrestling to the WWE than anyone. Bolin had a hand in making the careers of John Cena, Rico Costantino, Rob Conway, Mark Henry, Bobby Lashley, Sean O'Haire, Lance Cade, Mark Jindrak, Mike Mondo, Carlito, Sylvester Terkay, and many more. Now, the retired manager turned media giant is telling his story. One of the sharpest minds in the history of wrestling, Kenny Bolin's story has become the stuff of legend. From his humble beginnings as the son of Kentucky's last convicted cattle rustler; to his childhood friendship with the nefarious Jim Cornette; to the many schemes he allegedly perpetrated on the American public; to a chance meeting with Nick Gulas at Service Merchandise; you'll read how this humble Kentucky wrestling fan stubbornly refused to pay his dues and waited for the moment when the wrestling gods wised up and gave him what was coming to him. The tale of Kenny Bolin is so outlandish, so outrageous at times, you'll swear it can't possibly true - and some of it isn't. Thankfully, Kenny conned a few of his close, personal friends to come along for the ride to help you sort fact from fiction, including Mark Cuban, Jerry Lawler, Jerry Jarrett, Dutch Mantell, Rico Costantino, "The Sinister Minister" James Mitchell, Terry "Garvin" Simms, Dean Hill, Nova, JBL, Mark Henry, Damien Sandow, Sylvester Teraky, Bill Apter, and even Jim Cornette. This book may not be the most truthful book you'll ever read, but it is the most entertaining and funny wrestling memoir you'll read this week. So grab a chair, pop on a pair of Beets by Bolin headphones, and prepare to shake your head in disbelief as you read the (mostly) true stories of Kenny Starmaker Bolin.
- Sales Rank: #596605 in Books
- Published on: 2015-06-26
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 9.00" h x .58" w x 6.00" l, .76 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 254 pages
About the Author
If you want to know about the author of this book, buy the damn book and read it. It’s called an autobiography. The entire book is about the author. So if you think I’m gonna give even one thing away for free on the back page of this book, you’re even more ignorant than Danny Inferno.
Most helpful customer reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Kenny Bolin's grand feast of humor, hilarity and knowledge by the man who has downed many great feasts before!
By David A. Wills
If you are looking for a wrestling book with great analysis, a broad historical perspective and a fascinating and thought-provoking look back at yesteryear, Don't buy this book cause you ain't getting that here. Amazon sells those dime-a-dozen books all-day long on this site.
However, If you are looking for a book that is a look inside the life of one of the more interesting characters in Louisville and all of wrestling, a book full of hilarity with great digs and zings (especially at Jim Cornette and others), A book which made me laugh out loud multiple times in Buffalo Wild wings, THEN BUY THIS BOOK. Best of all, Kenny tells it like he sees it is and doesn't dare do like other so-called authors who let pesky things like truth and facts get in the way of a great, great story.
This man is not only a legend in Ohio Valley Wrestling, but also a icon in most Louisville Restaurants. Yet, Somehow, he doesn't have to buy a meal. Armed with nothing but quick wit, autographed photos, various DVDs and his Beets by Bolin headphones, he is able to talk his way into coming out with a free meal. I wouldn't be surprised with his gift of gab if after the free meal, he could figure out a way to even get himself some cash back like a human Rewards Credit Card and pick up a substantial 18% tip for himself as well. The fast-talking, sharp-tongued founder of Bolin Services was even able to get fans to spend almost eighty bucks to praise him in this book (page 220) to make even more CASH like the fine entrepreneur and American Success story he is.
If you love his podcast "The Bolin Alley" or think his appearances on "The Jim Cornette Experience" are off the chain, just wait until you read the book. I couldn't put the book down. I really couldn't put it down and I wound up reading the whole tome in one day. Make you sure the read the story of Timmy John, Jimmy and Kenny at the Cockfights (page 32) and especially the Chapter on Kenny as best man at Jim and Stacy's wedding (page 176) . If not for Kenny Bolin, the Cornette's wouldn't have had the glorious wedding day which they had all thanks to the Starmaker. Kenny even comes totally clean and admits the WORST THING HE HAS EVER DONE on Page 189. I couldn't believe it myself. HOW COULD YOU, BOLIN? WHY KENNY WHY???? For you roadie (rat) story fans, you should read about Bolin's Women on 246 to see an confession like no other previous confession in wrestling. He even give his opinions on the best restaurants in the greater Louisville area on 247. EVERYONE SHOULD PAY ATTENTION WHEN A FAT MAN TALKS ABOUT FOOD! Never trust a skinny restaurant critic! Bo(lin) knows wrestling and Bo(lin) knows FOOD!
Funnier than WWE investors conference call and equally as absurd as a TNA Profit and Loss statement, not only will you not be disappointed, but you will be happy you donated some of your fine hard-earned American dollars to America's Last Great Con Man... er, Last Great Cookware Salesman (page 53). Read about Ma Bolin, his brother Biscuits and Gravy, Nick Gulas, Jim Cornette, Jerry Lawler, Chris The Prince Bolin, Papa John, Col. Sanders, Mark Henry, Damien "Macho Mizdow" Sandow, plus many Bolin Services members including John Cena, Rico, and many more. With Comments by JBL, Sinister Minister James Mitchell, "Nova" Simon Dean, Terry Garvin Simms, Dutch "Zeb Colter" Mantel, Jerry Jarrett, and even Shark Tank's own Mark Cuban, I would rank it a definite must read. (If you can't read or if you are really really stupid, have some read it to you. I'm sure even Kenny himself might consider doing it over the phone for a per-minute premium price sent to his paypal.)
Spend the money. Don't be cheap like your wrestling fan brethren. If you sell it when you are finished, you probably can make Double your money back (page 49), just like the old meat guarantee at Kroger's grocery store in the 80's.(Better yet, Buy a few copies and sell those at a higher cost to friends to cover your costs. That will mean you learned something from Bolin.)
No, I didn't get a free book in exchange for a positive review of this book. Kenny's way too damn cheap to give any books away for free and that skinflint even would probably have charged me double postage also. I probably wouldn't mind if he did though. While some say that the best things in life are free, The mostly true stories of Bolin aren't free and never will be, but your purchase of this fine read will allow you (for a mere pittance) to be one of the few, the proud to now be able to admit (just like me) that Kenny Bolin probably screwed you too!!!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
A life changing book from a larger than life figure.
By Patrick McCarty
Everyone must read this man's book now! If you hate that obnoxious prick of a has been wrestling manager with a tennis racket you must read this book! If you hate the Kroger company and all the nazi like tactics they engage in you must read this book! If you hate the University of Kentucky Wildcats and you think their fans are idiots especially certain fans from Carrollton, KY who live on the Kentucky River you must read this book! If you're disgruntled with modern wrestling and think more progressive tactics and original ideas need to be implemented in order to save the wrestling industry you absolutely must read this book! If you hate the Irish and all their drunken ways you must read this book! If you hate the horrible state of Indiana and think all residents should jump in the Ohio River and drown you must read this book! If you hate any Golden Corral haters you must read this book! Oh did I mention that prick of a former wrestling manager with the nerdy glasses who complains all the time? Yes if you hate that jerk you must read this book! If you hate being screwed you still MUST ABSOLUTELY read this book! It's that important!
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
I occasionally like to hear it from a real pro like you"
By Jim Mitchell
In grammar school I was mesmerized by an older kid in the neighborhood that wore a T-shirt which featured a defecating bovine and the caption, "Although I consider myself to be a world class bulls***ter, I occasionally like to hear it from a real pro like you", or something along those lines. That pretty much sums up my feelings for Kenny Bolin and his book. Bolin slings bulls*** with the artistry of Jackson Pollock throwing paint on a canvas. He is a shameless grifter, but the kind that makes you want to get lied to or ripped off by him at least once, just to say you had the honor of experiencing it.
Kenny Bolin had a hand in guiding the careers of numerous pro-wrestlers that went on to become household names. Amidst a treasure trove of hilarious wrestling anecdotes, are even funnier off-camera antics. A non-wrestling fan stuck in a bathroom with nothing else to read would be thoroughly entertained by opening up this book on any page.
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